Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.
  • How do you react when you see someone you respect on an e-scooter?
  • Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.
  • Whenever I’m sad, you’re there. Whenever I have problems, you’re there. Whenever I lose control, you’re there. Let’s face it, you are bad luck.
  • They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.
  • My kids acting shocked there’s ants in my car like they’re not Hansel and Gretel leaving bloody crumb trails.