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Commentary:
"Senility: turning mall parking lots into your own personal labyrinth game 🚗🔀 Keep calm, the car hunt adventure continues! #LostAndFoundInMall"

aging, around, car, driving, forgetfulness, hour, humor, looking, lot, mall, parking, parking lot, senility, spent

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27 shares on WeChat this month:

I will die on this hill or any hill really. I have no hill preference.

74 shares on Slack this month:

I’m old enough to remember when regular websites were usable.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The second cup of coffee does for me what a can of spinach does for Popeye.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

To quote Hamlet Act III, Scene III, Line 92 “No.”

31 shares on Slack this month:

The Internet is fun because you can post about banana bread and somehow end up in a fight.

14 shares on Reddit this month:

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

89 shares on Slack this month:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

14 shares on Instagram this month:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

99 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t care for small talk. I prefer awkward silence.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Getting a girlfriend is actually very easy, you just have to spin a basketball on your finger.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

I’m gonna start sending women unsolicited pizza pics.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

There are two types of people in politics. Avoid them.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Hey, can I get an ETA on that “this too shall pass”?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Responding to all selfies with “this should work.”

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Don’t donate your plasma. It’s a big scam, and they’re just using it to make TVs.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

They should invent a type of sleeping where you wake up feeling rested.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Every time I want to use a big word that I just know the meaning of, I Google it first, just in case.

Just landed via WeChat:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Spotted on Twitch:

My doctor told me I should try anger management classes, and I’m still really pissed at him about it.

Seen just now on X:

Remember when we had to smack the TV cause it wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about too many people.

Breaking via Twitch:

I enjoy long, romantic walks … to the departure gate.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

A girl was coming over till she wasn’t—that’s what happened.

Just landed via WeChat:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Senility is the pits. Spent an hour driving around the mall parking lot looking for my car.

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Just because I can’t sing doesn’t mean I won’t sing.

You should never donate to people that collect money for marathons. They just take your money and run.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Senility is the pits. Spent an hour driving around the mall parking lot looking for my car.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Just because I can’t sing doesn’t mean I won’t sing.

You should never donate to people that collect money for marathons. They just take your money and run.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨