Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • My wife screamed β€œyou haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.
  • When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.
  • Nobody will know you’re stoned if you’re always stoned.
  • Double chins are better than double faces.
  • In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.
  • Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.