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Commentary:
"Ah, the infamous magic trick of cats: Projectile Vomiting Primarily on Plush Palaces! 🐱🤢🧹 Who needs a bathroom when you have a perfectly good carpet to target, right?"

ability, carpet, cat, cats, cleaning, humor, mess, pet, throw, throw up

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35 shares on WeChat this month:

Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

83 shares on Discord this month:

If I was a fish, I’d be smoking all the seaweed.

73 shares on Threads this month:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

89 shares on Twitch this month:

The female brain works like the internet. You can delete something, but it’s never really gone.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it’s illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!

56 shares on YouTube this month:

Just saying “Think about it!” is enough to overwhelm many people these days.

63 shares on Instagram this month:

My fairytale would be called the princess and the pea sized bladder.

10 shares on Reddit this month:

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

83 shares on X this month:

When does hibernation actually begin? I wanna take part this year.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

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Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Staring at the sky for answers, nothing new.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I used to love going out with people. Now I weigh the pros and cons of human interaction, like it’s a business decision.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

I love when the universe delivers receipts.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Not now, babe, it’s my nightly phone enrichment time.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I love convincing myself iced coffee counts as hydration and self-care.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

Today I ate vegetable lasagna… I don’t want to talk about it.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

They should have a section on the wing of the plane where people can go out for a cigarette.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

The hottest thing a man can be is boring in his 30s.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

The Internet is fun because you can post about banana bread and somehow end up in a fight.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

Just once I’d like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I regret to inform you all that I just plan on getting hotter and weirder.

Making waves on Slack:

1994: I can’t wait to see what the world is like in 30 years. 2024: God no.

Spotted on Discord:

Studies show that 100% of all parents think alcohol tastes much better after spending the day with children.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Shared recently on Threads:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Shared recently on Telegram:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Trending via Discord:

I can do anything, as long as there’s a looming deadline and serious consequences.

Making waves on Discord:

Everyone thinks they’re a badass until seaweed brushes their leg.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

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Activity Log ✨

That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

I have so many mood swings, I’m basically a swing now.

Any day now, there will be a child born and named Labubu.

I feel like smashing my phone would be cathartic.

The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

He said he thinks I’m resilient to everything, so I thanked him, but on second thought, he may have low key called me a cockroach.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I have so many mood swings, I’m basically a swing now.

Any day now, there will be a child born and named Labubu.

I feel like smashing my phone would be cathartic.

The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

He said he thinks I’m resilient to everything, so I thanked him, but on second thought, he may have low key called me a cockroach.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨