Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Damn boy, are you a horoscope? Because I’m selectively focusing on the parts of you that make sense for me.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Indiana Jones is a fantasy about being a professor with no admin duties.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

4,038

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Threads:

Smart people are like huskies. If you don’t give them an interesting problem, they become an interesting problem.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Broadcasted on Threads:

In my retweeting era, because I’m just speechless.

Seen just now on Discord:

Have kids so you can say things you never thought you would like “please don’t vacuum your sister”

Freshly posted on WeChat:

We seriously need to bring back courting. What the hell is ‘wyd tonight?’ Arrive on a horse and bring flowers like a man.

Trending via Telegram:

Just knowing that I have to get out of bed tomorrow is already annoying and it’s not even dark yet.

Freshly posted on Discord:

If there was a pill for procrastination… I’d probably take it tomorrow.

Just shared via YouTube:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

The more I practice, the luckier I get.

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Mastering the ancient art of "It is what it is" with a black belt in not giving a hoot! 🎨🦉✨

art, humor, letting, letting go, mindset, opinion, think, whatever

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

0

1 month ago

anything, art, creativity, doing, doing nothing, form, getting, humor, laziness, nothing, relaxation, tired
Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

0

5 months ago

box, came, electronic, electronics, humor, men, question, still, storage, why
I don’t think I’d get married again, but I would like to annoy someone until one of us is dead.

0

4 months ago

again, annoy, commitment, dead, death, humor, i, ID, marriage, married, relationship, someone, spouse, think, us
Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

0

2 months ago

bad, better, consequence, enemy, fine, gamble, humor, irony, just, miss, risk, spear, strategy, throwing, weapon
A friend’s boyfriend is not my friend… that is a coworker, at best.

0

1 month ago

best, boyfriend, coworker, dynamics, friend, friends, friendship, humor, relationship, social, social dynamics, workplace
I don’t like to call it a xenomorph — I prefer the term “the alien from Alien.”

0

1 month ago

alien, call, culture, humor, humorist, i, joke, movie, movie joke, parody, pop, pop culture, sci-fi, term, xenomorph

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m optimistic, in a pessimistic way.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

98 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

Dating app that matches you based on your risk tolerance for airport arrival timing.

93 shares on Threads this month:

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I feel for my kids, who had to take in the groceries and put them away today. They may never recover from this traumatic experience.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

54 shares on Slack this month:

“Stand up for yourself!” Girl, I have low iron.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry for setting the impossible standards that the rest of you try to live up to.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

After hearing that I have too many books and too many bookshelves, I’ve decided to cut back on the amount of people I listen to.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

We don’t get a song of the summer this year because we were bad.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Actually, no one sees you at your worst like your coworkers do.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Social Media Log 💫

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

I don’t think I’d get married again, but I would like to annoy someone until one of us is dead.

Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

A friend’s boyfriend is not my friend… that is a coworker, at best.

I don’t like to call it a xenomorph — I prefer the term “the alien from Alien.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨