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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

An electric car is just another electric chair.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Science can’t explain it, but some hairs can grow up to a quarter inch overnight. Never in a good spot though.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Why can’t periods just last for an hour? Like, you made your point, I’m not pregnant, you can leave now.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I love people who are fluent in Spongebob references.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2316 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,478

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,478

17 minutes ago

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Live now on TikTok:

Imagine playing Truth or Dare and they dare you to go home.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Most of being a woman is just removing exclamation points from emails before you send them.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

Going viral on YouTube:

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I need a day off from myself.

Reported on Pinterest:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

The cool thing about ignoring a notification is being surprised to see it over and over again.

6 months ago

The cool thing about ignoring a notification is being surprised to see it over and over again.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Isn't it funny how our phones can have the memory of an elephant when it comes to notifications? 🤷‍♂️ Ignoring them once is like an open invitation for them to come knocking on your screen forever! 📱😂 It's like they're saying, "Hey, remember me? I'm still here waiting for you to give me some attention!" 🤭 #PersistenceIsKey #NotificationOverload

again, being, cool, humor, ignoring, notification, over, repetition, surprise, technology, thing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2316 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,478

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,478

17 minutes ago

3,458

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I love being outside, just not when it’s too cold or too hot or too wet or too windy or if there are bugs.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Halloween is cool, but nothing is spookier than my previous choices in men.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you every day.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Ruining the Olympics for my fiancée by, every time they mention Paris, saying, “that’s where Ratatouille lived”.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Drinking a couple of beers and then getting onto Red Dead Redemption, and just petting my horse and feeding it apples.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

I started at the bottom, and it’s been downhill ever since.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If you think my posts are horrid, wait until you see the live stream of my colonoscopy.

Seen just now on X:

If I ever go missing, please print my picture on wine bottles and not on milk boxes. My friends are more likely to find me then.

Going viral on Instagram:

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

Seen just now on Slack:

I don’t hate anyone in particular, I just hate everyone in general.

Seen just now on Threads:

The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, Eat cake.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

Trending via Facebook:

Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.

Making waves on WeChat:

Pornhub be like “Your phone got a virus,” bro, just play the bloody video.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

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