Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

That second wave of sleep after waking up too early.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

This is not what adulthood looked like in the brochure.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Lady on the streets, Cheeto crumbs in my sheets.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Sorry, but if you’re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, you’re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if you’re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, I’m thinking enemy.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a different realm.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,545

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,545

Nov 27, 2025

3,778

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

Big decision to make? Sleep on it. Have a nightmare. Then you’ll be operating on pure adrenaline and will choose more quickly.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m writing a book on the joys of drinking beer. So far I’ve been through a lot of drafts.

Live now on Instagram:

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

Seen just now on Discord:

Girls will be like “it’s fine” then start drawing a pentagram in blood on their floorboards.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

The funniest thing about Batman is that he legitimately doesn’t give a shit about crime that happens during the day.

Breaking via X:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Shared recently on X:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Making waves on WeChat:

How can you not appreciate a drunk text? Someone is absolutely off their face and still thinking of you.

Just shared via Facebook:

I am like the weather. Temporarily friendly.

Live now on Messenger:

Letting my wife sleep in a little longer for Mother’s Day before we wake her up and ask what’s for breakfast.

The plan was simple: finish school, find a job and get married at 25. But now I don’t understand anything anymore.

3 weeks ago

The plan was simple: finish school, find a job and get married at 25. But now I don’t understand anything anymore.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🎓💼💍 "Ah, the perfectly laid out plan – so beautiful in theory, yet quite the unruly troublemaker in practice! Life really knows how to keep us on our toes, doesn't it? 🤷‍♂️ Who knew that choosing a career and finding 'the one' could be such wild adventures! Buckle up, friend, because the unexpected twists make it all the more exciting! 🌪️"

25, age, anything, confusion, expectations, finish, i, job, life, marriage, married, plan, school, simple, understand

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,545

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,545

Nov 27, 2025

3,899

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Lego bricks are classic educational toys. You step on them once and you can do ballet.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

How does one stop eating ice cream when there’s still some in the container?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

I hate lying to my parents but it’s for their own good.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

My anxiety is chronic, but my overthinking is iconic.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

My milkshakes bring all the bots to the yard.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Asking the birds outside my window if they know any Metallica.

Broadcasted on X:

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Going viral on Threads:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Asian parents give you unmoanable names so you can focus on your studies.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I’m so loyal to my music, I’ll hunt down a song I used to love five years back.

Trending via Instagram:

Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I hope we get the nice AI that enslaves us and makes us their pets and not the bad AI that enslaves us to mine lithium or something.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴