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Commentary:
Looks like your plant app is being about as helpful as a magic eight ball! 🪴💦🚱 Maybe it's time to switch to a Plant Psychic app instead? 🔮😂

app, care, confusion, gardening, helpful, humor, i, much, plant, thanks, too, watered

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

0

6 months ago

1990, 2003, age, both, flirting, humor, nostalgia, where, year
Explaining myself is too much work, just judge me.

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4 months ago

attitude, explaining, explanation, humor, judge, judgment, just, laziness, me, much, myself, too, work
Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

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2 months ago

care, chicken, chicken nugget, chicken nuggets, date, food, gift, humor, love, nugget, relationship, rose, show
Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

0

2 months ago

avoid, detachment, freedom, happiness, introvert, nothing, people, social, solitude, want
Welcome to your 40s, you’re too old to sit on the floor and put furniture together.

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2 months ago

40s, age, assembling, floor, furniture, getting, getting older, humor, life, life stage, old, older, put, sit, sitting, sitting on floor, stage, together, too, welcome
Why is Saturday over in 7 minutes and Sunday in 4 minutes, but Monday is 84 months long?

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2 months ago

4, duration, humor, minutes, Monday, months, over, perception, Saturday, Sunday, time, weekend

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on Facebook this month:

Most of my exercise comes from getting up to let the cat in and out.

66 shares on YouTube this month:

Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

44 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

38 shares on Slack this month:

Going through life with a signature I invented as a teenager.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

There are no laws against pineapples on pizza.

40 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sex is cool, but have you ever made peace with the horror of being alive.

41 shares on Threads this month:

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

52 shares on Facebook this month:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

75 shares on Discord this month:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

The ’90s were a time of blissful ignorance where we expected rock stars to sleep with groupies.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Every outdoor cat should be given a little cowboy hat and a gun.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for cauliflower cookies and reported them for harmful content.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

The most dangerous drinking game I play, is seeing how long I can go without coffee.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Can’t. Inventing new things to worry about.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Remember when we were kids and did everything we could to grow up? We were so stupid!

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Switching between brainrot and deep intellectual talks is a skill that only a few acquire.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

It’s funny how our brains remember that we have forgotten something, but not what we have forgotten.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

Breaking via YouTube:

Can hardly wait until my winter fat turns into spring rolls.

Making waves on Slack:

Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

Just shared via Threads:

Waking up early is always beneficial. You just gotta make it past those first 10 minutes of being irritated.

Making waves on Facebook:

I don’t expect everything handed to me, just set it down outside my door.

Trending via Snapchat:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Making waves on Slack:

Your 20s are for trying soup, making new soups, and discussing soup or soup related topics.

Spotted on Discord:

I want to have a penguin that just waddles up to me whenever I’m sad.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

Explaining myself is too much work, just judge me.

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

Welcome to your 40s, you’re too old to sit on the floor and put furniture together.

Why is Saturday over in 7 minutes and Sunday in 4 minutes, but Monday is 84 months long?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨