There’s nothing worse than accidentally becoming an important person at your job.

There's nothing worse than accidentally becoming an important person at your job.

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I have so much to offer. It’s all bad, but still.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs good vibes when you can offer bad ones with confidence? 😏 Embracing the chaos and imperfection like a pro! 🤪💥 #JustBeingReal”

  • Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

    Commentary:
    🍻 “I considered quitting drinking tonight, but then I thought about the poor pub owner’s family relying on my contributions. Hey, who am I to deprive them of their livelihood? Cheers to generosity with a side of guilt!” 🤣 #DrinkResponsibly #SupportLocalBusiness

  • The closest I’ve come to mastering a martial art is figuring out how to wash my feet in the shower.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like this ninja’s special move is the ‘Soapy Sock Slide’ technique! 👣🚿💥 Who needs a black belt when you can have squeaky clean feet instead? 😂 #ShowerNinja”

  • My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

    Commentary:
    “Trying to rely on my mental health is like using a flashlight in a horror film – it flickers at the worst moments and inevitably leaves me in the dark 🕯️😱 But hey, at least there’s always a twist ending, right? 😅”

  • Apparently “ew no” is not an acceptable way to tell my boss I don’t want more responsibility at work.

    Commentary:
    🤷‍♂️ When “ew no” meets the professional world, things can get a little tricky! 🙈 Apparently, not all bosses speak the language of “ew no” fluently. Time to brush up on those communication skills, or just stick to the good ol’ eye roll and heavy sigh combo. 😉 #ProfessionalCommunicationFail

  • My wife refuses to hire a housekeeper because she doesn’t want them to see this mess.

    Commentary:
    Looks like the mess is on a strict need-to-know basis only! 🤫🚫 Who knew secrecy was a crucial element in housekeeping? 😂🧹 #TopSecretMess