This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Coffee should be free for everyone Monday through Friday.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

It’s like 10,000 steps when all you need is a nap.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.