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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Crazy part about being an overthinker is most times you right.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

It’s like my therapist always says, that’ll be $175.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

The fact that I procrastinate and still get the job done is the reason I still procrastinate.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Here’s to another day of outward smiles and inward screams.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I should’ve gotten my affairs in order before I decided to bite into this hot pepper.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,543

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My guardian angel is probably preoccupied with sports betting apps and generative AI, that’s why she’s letting all these bad things happen to me.

Making waves on Pinterest:

The goal is never Gucci bags. It’s acres of land.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

Live now on Slack:

I tried counting sheep so I can fall asleep but that got boring, so I started talking to the shepherd instead.

Going bananas on X:

My parents didn’t raise me to order something expensive when someone else is paying.

Trending via Slack:

I don’t believe in lying to children, unless it’s about where the good snacks are hidden. Then it’s fine.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” My dear, that entirely depends on the rest of the information you’re about to give me.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I miss when The Weeknd was making sex-addict-on-drugs music.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Gollum is like, “Actually, this is my emotional support precious.”

Shared recently on X:

Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!

Two bros having a conversation in the 1700s like “omg, we should totally start a pamphlet”

1 month ago

Playful text imagining 1700s bros joking about starting a pamphlet, humorous and witty.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, those 18th-century bros and their revolutionary ideas! 🧐💬 "Dude, let's totally drop some truths on paper and stir up some trouble!" 🖋️📜 It was the original version of starting a viral tweet storm! 😂 #ThrowbackRevolutionaries

1700s, anachronism, bro, conversation, friendship, having, history, humor, pamphlet, should, start

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on Twitch this month:

Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

49 shares on X this month:

After much deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m an overthinker.

41 shares on TikTok this month:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

61 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The fake cough I use when calling in sick is now available on iTunes.

85 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

35 shares on Reddit this month:

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

13 shares on Twitch this month:

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Out of all my body parts, I’m sure my eyes are in the best shape. I do at least 463 eye rolls a day.

74 shares on Discord this month:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to hell.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m always sad when my sandwich is over.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If you think I’m rude, you should hear the voices in my head.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood – a never-ending story of shit you have to do.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone. But it will pass.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,731

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Nobody is more cold-blooded than a toddler, just saying what they see and feel.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

How do I get one of those fake corporate jobs where I work remotely, get paid for responding to one email a day, and have a laptop on with Outlook or whatever open?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I like how my fridge also hums when it’s trying to concentrate.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

There is nothing an orgasm can’t fix, I have researched it extensively.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Quality women really do attract everyone. A bright light always attracts all types of bugs.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

“I’ll run it by the boss” is one of the peak boomerisms you can say as a married man. It feels electric.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

So cool that avocados come with those little wooden balls inside, I think I have collected the whole set.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

Spreading quickly via X:

Me and the fellas making welcome gift baskets for the aliens.

Just landed via Threads:

It’s our first time on Earth, so why are you a life coach?

Live now on Discord:

Just said “shitted feet” instead of “fitted sheet” in front of my my son and his friends. If you need me, I’ll be in the closet.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Why is no one talking about the sheer pleasure of coming home from vacation and using your own bathroom.

Seen just now on Threads:

Nobody says “boom shakalaka” like they used to.

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m planning to save money on Christmas gifts this year by wrapping up all the toys my toddler dropped behind the couch.

Trending via WhatsApp:

A big part of my wife’s cardio routine is rolling away from me in bed.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Journaling was the most useless thing l ever attempted. Not only am I still suffering but now there’s evidence.

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