Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Dating me is super easy. I text you at 8; you reply at 8:00:01.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Santa doesn’t check the naughty list anymore, he just checks social media.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

I need to get my shit together, but at this point, I’m waiting to see if the world is going to end before I put any real effort in.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2381 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,543

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,543

1 hour ago

3,458

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

Petition to bring back payphones in public places. I don’t want to give my kid a phone, I want to give him a quarter.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Does anyone have the number of the witch from Snow White? I need a few apples.

Spotted on Messenger:

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Trending via Instagram:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Breaking via Threads:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Reported on WeChat:

And to my great-grandchildren, I leave 48,567 screenshots.

Going viral on Instagram:

Those who run away from me are afraid that they might confess their love to me.

Making waves on Instagram:

You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not a jar of Nutella.

Going viral on Pinterest:

80 years ago we would have all been institutionalized and I think that’s beautiful.

Just shared via Discord:

Not again. I mean good morning.

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Jan 24, 2025

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, so vaping is like the ultimate cockblocker for onlookers, huh? 😂🚭 Nothing like a cloud of vapor to spice up the atmosphere, or kill the mood, depending on who you ask! 💨🚫 So, watch out vapers, you might inadvertently be saving yourself from unwanted advances! 😅 #VapeAndChill

attraction, behavior, drive, health, humor, just, people, perception, relationships, sex, sex drive, smoking, social, social behavior, vaping

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2381 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,543

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,543

1 hour ago

3,454

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Frankly, I have too many situations and not enough monitors.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Being a sleepy girl with a busy life is so hard.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Breakfast is the most important beer of the day.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

Responding to all selfies with “this should work.”

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Just landed via X:

There could be a ghost aggressively breakdancing beside you right now and you’d have no idea.

Going viral on X:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’ve got midlife crises older than you.

Spotted on Slack:

I’m sorry that I’m canceling plans. I made them last week when I assumed that, by now, I’d be a different person.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

ROMO (relief of missing out)

Freshly posted on Telegram:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Freshly posted on Slack:

They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

Breaking via Discord:

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

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