Trendy Funny Quotes

  • If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.
  • Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.
  • Experts say you can make any statement sound more credible by adding ‘experts say’ at the beginning.
  • Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.
  • When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”
  • My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.