Alcohol: When you want to run away from your problems without moving. Posted on3 weeks ago by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:"Alcohol: Your one-way ticket to avoiding responsibilities while staying in one spot! 🍻🏃♂️ #ProcrastinationStation" Related Funny Posts 🤝 If you ever see me running, it’s either away from my problems or towards an ice cream van. If alcohol damages your short-term memory, imagine what alcohol can do. I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison. It’s okay to run away from the cops if you’re shy. A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.