Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”
  • If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.
  • I’m no Hobbit, but I do often walk blindly into some rather dodgy situations.
  • I think my soulmate might be carbs.
  • My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.
  • The way time stretches between the moment you put your hands under the air dryer and the realization it is in fact a paper towel dispenser.