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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I would rather walk directly into the ocean than tell people a fun fact about myself.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

I’ve tasted being employed, and I’ve tasted being unemployed. I recommend not being born.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

The world is my ostrich, or whatever.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

When gearing up for a mountain climbing adventure it is important to remember to no.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

As you get older, nothing loses its sting more than an authority figure saying they are disappointed in you. Like, I don’t know what to tell you, dude, we can’t both live in the prison of your expectations.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

I really admire the suns ability to be exactly where my car’s visor can’t block it out.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

809 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,971

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,971

7 minutes ago

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

I put on my Godzilla costume, then go to the miniature golf course to beat up the windmill.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Just landed via X:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Spotted on Twitch:

Life’s all about crossroads and intersections; unfortunately, I’m a bad driver.

Seen just now on Threads:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

Just shared via Instagram:

One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Just landed via TikTok:

The concept of warding off vampires with crosses is so interesting to me. I wonder if it applies to any other religion or if they’re allergic to just Catholicism.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My daughter asked me what it’s like to be a parent, so I woke her up at 3 AM to let her know that I couldn’t sleep.

Spotted on TikTok:

I plan the silliest murders in my dreams because all I have to do to get away with it is wake up.

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

6 months ago

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like the web developer is keen on expanding their search query optimization skills everywhere they go! 🕵️‍♂️🔍 Meanwhile, the SEO expert is probably already eyeing up the bar's meta tags and keyword density for a potential improvement project. 🍻💻 Cheers to a night of optimizing and imbibing in equal measure! 🍹💻🚀

alcohol, area, bar, beer, developer, drink, drinking, drinks, expert, humor, nightclub, nightlife, place, place to drink, places, pub, seo, SEO expert, tavern, walk, web, web developer

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

809 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,971

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,971

7 minutes ago

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

I’ve never seen a McDonald’s or a Burger King under construction. They just show up.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Everyone is celebrating my vegan Bolognese sauce. The secret ingredient is minced meat.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

Got the zoomies at work, and now HR is chasing me around with a butterfly net.

Making waves on Facebook:

Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I’m so bored of being bored because being bored is really boring.

Just shared via Telegram:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Just flipped my mattress, should have woken up my wife first.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I want to run through your dreams and settle in your nightmares.

Trending via Messenger:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Breaking via YouTube:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Trending via X:

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

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