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Now I know why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour.

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This Monday could have been an email.

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I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

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Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

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People who quit their jobs before having a backup job lined up ainโ€™t scared of nothing.

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The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

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Know what goes good with beer? Another one.

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Stretching is not enough. I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

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I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

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Coffee ainโ€™t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

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In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

Commentary:
"๐ŸŽถ In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is probably rolling her eyes every time my songs blast through the store speakers. Sorry, Mariah, I'll try to keep up! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ›’"



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