Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If people continue to behave so badly, I will donate my organs to an animal shelter.
  • Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.
  • I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.
  • If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.
  • Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.
  • Never feel bad when people roll their eyes while you talk to them. They’re just looking for their brain.