Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.
  • If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.
  • I tried to clean up my Chrome tabs but it turns out all 200 of them contain information that is vital for my survival.
  • I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.
  • Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.
  • Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.