Someone from has shared:

Men microdose bicuriousness by asking what you’d do for a million dollars.

Someone from has shared:

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Someone from has viewed:

My girlfriend wants us to try couples counseling and I said we should use my therapist because he already knows what’s wrong with her.

Someone from has downloaded:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Someone from has downloaded:

If we’re walking together, just know I’ll definitely bump into you because I can’t walk in a straight line.

Someone from has downloaded:

I’m sorry, but I already have an A.I. boyfriend.

Someone from has bookmarked:

Life is weird and then you die.

Someone from has bookmarked:

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

Someone from has viewed:

You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”

Someone from has downloaded:

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.