Girls will be like, “This is my comfort song,” and it’s the howling of a wolf inside a dark forest.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I am such a fun person and so easy to get along with as long as the layout I have secretly imagined for the entire day goes exactly as I planned it without variation or interruption.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Just washed my windows and not a single bloke came out and said ‘You can do mine next!’ This used to be a real country.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

The first pyramid scheme was when the Egyptians took credit for the pyramids that were clearly built by aliens.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Every room is a panic room if someone farts.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Psych meds aren’t enough anymore. Hit me with a shovel.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Gonna get my eye looked at today. Usually it’s the other way around.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m like if a birthday card with no money inside was a person.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

One thing about me is I don’t even need to get drunk to act a fool.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Who’s up thinking about the crushing weight of existence?