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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New funny quotes: 7714 this month

15,818 funny quotes and pics

17,813 funny quotes topics

Updated: May 24, 2026

 

 

 

 

66 Funny metaphor quotes

Funny metaphor quotes are like the sprinkle of humor on the cupcake of life 🎂😂. They add a zing of wit that transforms ordinary moments into extraordinary chuckles 🌟. Whether you’re as busy as a bee 🐝 or feeling like a fish out of water 🐟, these quirky comparisons offer a fresh perspective, tickling your funny bone along the way. Dive into the playful world of silly similes and let the laughter ripple through your day! 🎉😄

Life is like bread. It gets hard at some point.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Sometimes life is like a cowshed. You step from one turd into the next.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Do you ever feel like you’re a white shirt and life is a red wine?

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I am so full of love and anger, like a lava lamp.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I’m an adult in the same way a tomato is a fruit.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Never wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Just found out that rock bottom has a basement.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

He just walked right into my heart and switched on the lights.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

The lioness does not concern herself with the pile of clothes she moves between bed and chair every day.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Girls with long hair will literally leave little traces of themselves wherever they go, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

He’s an everything bagel… I’m just a nothing burger…

Posted onMay 19, 2026

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Phone is a cigarette for eyes.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I was a nothingburger to him, but he was an everything bagel to me…

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Nothing like a meteor shower to remind you that burning out can still be breathtaking.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

“Nothing burger” is such a funny phrase. Americans when nothing: so imagine a burger.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Much like a candle, I was tall when I was young, but I get shorter as I grow old.

Posted onMay 18, 2026

Putting a hot frying pan into a sink running with cold water makes me feel like a blacksmith.

Posted onMay 18, 2026

A storm knows it’s laced with destruction, and yet it rages on.

Posted onMay 18, 2026

Perhaps moths don’t seek the light, but are simply fleeing the darkness.

Posted onMay 18, 2026

Milk or be milked.

Posted onMay 6, 2026

Some people still fail to understand that the boot still has no problem crushing you, even if you lick it clean.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Sometimes, when you go with the flow you end up drowning with everyone else.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Love low-hanging fruit. Easiest kind to obtain, in my opinion.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Life is like a penis. Sometimes it’s up, sometimes it’s down. But it’s never hard forever.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Like an advent calendar, you make me want to open up more every day.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Showing your emotions to the wrong people is like bleeding next to a shark.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

“It’s not that deep!” Well, I have a shovel and I enjoy digging for meaning.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Floppy disks are like Jesus. They died to become the icon of saving.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

My ducks are not even remotely in a row. My ducks are in places no duck has ever gone before.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

When you are a leg-bouncer and someone asks you to stop, it’s like they’re asking you to stop your own heart.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

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