There should be bloopers at the end of horror movies, so it relaxes you before bedtime.

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People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

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Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

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One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

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Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Slowly descending into madness. Anyone want anything?

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People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

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Alcohol: When you want to run away from your problems without moving.

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We live in a time where intelligent people are being silenced, so that stupid people won’t be offended.

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Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

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Not being filthy rich is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.