“I’m not even close to how crazy I’m legally entitled to be.”

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I’ve never found a “Remember Me” checkbox that works. Nothing remembers me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Half of all the problems in life can be solved by duct tape. For the rest, you’re gonna have to reboot that computer.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Most guys probably just have a foot fetish because their first girlfriend was a sock.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Every girl is defined by their one lost love. And by that I mean the one fast food item that was discontinued without warning, subsequently ruining their life.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Walking into someone’s house with healthy, thriving houseplants everywhere: “Oh, I see you dabble in witchcraft!”