Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Next time I feel incompetent at my job, I hope I remember that someone once pushed a live software update that crashed half the planet.
  • I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.
  • I have everything you could possibly ever need in my purse, except for money.
  • Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.
  • Social media is proof that even mental hospitals have WiFi.
  • Damn girl, are you a plate of microwaved leftovers? Because you’re hot on the outside and cold on the inside.