Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
☕️🔋 "When coffee loses its spark, it's time to switch to battery-powered breakfast! ⚡️ Just make sure you're recharged and ready to go all day long…literally!" 🤣 #PowerUpWithBatteries #MorningEnergyBoost

battery, caffeine, coffee, craving, cutting, eat, energy, humor, i, need

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m never really sure what to do with my hands when I go jogging, so I don’t go jogging.

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2 months ago

awkwardness, exercise, fitness, hand, hand awkwardness, hands, humor, i, indecision, jogging, never, running, sure
For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

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2 months ago

attention, birthday, celebration, detail, everyone, humor, i, love, me, much, request, tell, want, why
Cheating on an exam by memorizing all the content beforehand so I can easily answer the questions.

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5 months ago

answer, cheating, content, easily, exam, i, memorizing, question, questions
This is actually worse than Biff Tennan’s future.

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2 months ago

actually, back, Back to the Future, biff, Biff Tannen, comparison, future, humor, movie, movie reference, reference, tannen, worse, worst
Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

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2 months ago

2007, back, bad, bad luck, email, forward, humor, i, irony, life, luck, people, regrets
Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

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2 months ago

advice, biologically, biology, connect, connection, daily, eat, else, enjoy, enjoyment, everything, food, fun, good, human, human connection, humans, humor, laid, life, life advice, literally, motivation, reminder, yourself

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on X this month:

Insulting me won’t work. I already said that to myself earlier.

40 shares on Snapchat this month:

My lawyer dropped his briefcase and nunchuks fell out.

74 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

72 shares on Telegram this month:

Flirting is easy until it’s someone you actually like.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Does anyone have the number of the witch from Snow White? I need a few apples.

50 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

87 shares on Facebook this month:

Don’t flirt with me. I’ll show up at your house and start eating all your snacks.

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

64 shares on X this month:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

17 shares on WeChat this month:

October is the situationship of months. So briefly beautiful, but you know the horrors are imminent.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Parents be like “why aren’t you eating, don’t you like my food?” and after you eat a ton, they’ll say “you look a little chubby, maybe you should eat less.”

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Socks try to be monogamous, but most end up either single or having multiple different partners.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

The only thing I don’t miss about the 90s is people smelling like cigarettes.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

Please help my husband and I decide on dinner. We’ve narrowed it down to “It doesn’t matter” and “It’s your turn to choose”.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Just told my kids it’s illegal to have the light on while we’re driving. I will not break this cycle.

Live now on Snapchat:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Spotted on Messenger:

It’s not my fault that when I said you looked “stunning” you assumed I meant in a positive way.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Like me, the weather is getting cooler around here.

Just landed via Messenger:

Unfortunately, I could never be nonchalant because I am not well in the head, and also my soul is on fire.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

“Dairy Queen” is actually the perfect drag name.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Trending via Twitch:

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Today I told my daughter she’s giving me a headache! She told me “For suggestions and complaints, contact the manufacturer.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Coffee ain’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’m never really sure what to do with my hands when I go jogging, so I don’t go jogging.

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

Cheating on an exam by memorizing all the content beforehand so I can easily answer the questions.

This is actually worse than Biff Tennan’s future.

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨