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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

I told my suitcase we wouldn’t be going on vacation this year; now it’s dead inside and I’m left with emotional baggage.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

My ducks: in a row. My elephant: addressed. My eggs: several baskets. My bigger fish: fried.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

“You are what you eat”. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

That “so we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Jan 7, 2026

3,466

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

It’s hard dating someone who has been single for a long time. Any slight inconvenience, and they’ll crawl back into their peaceful abode. No stress.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

Going viral on Facebook:

Maybe the reason you haven’t found your soulmate is because you don’t have a soul.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

At some point in life, you graduate from Family Guy to American Dad.

Just landed via Facebook:

My Uber driver didn’t try to talk to me the entire ride. Five stars.

Seen just now on Threads:

Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

No matter how weird things seem to get, there’s always an episode of The Twilight Zone that was eerily similar.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I showered with my boyfriend. My breasts have never been so clean! Wow!

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Why are conclusions necessary in essays? Were you not following?

Freshly posted on Slack:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

2 months ago

0

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs a knight in shining armor when you have coffee coming to your rescue? ☕️💪 When life gives you lemons, trade them for some espresso shots and tackle the day like the caffeine-fueled warrior you are! ☕️🔥 #CoffeeIsLife"

caffeine, coffee, combo, drink, humor, morning, perfect

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Dear Aliens, Now would be a good time. Thanks!

0

2 months ago

aliens, communication, extraterrestrial, good, humor, request, thanks, time
God forbid a girl wanna kiss and be kissed.

0

2 months ago

affection, girl, God, humor, kiss, relationship
People don’t realize how hard you ride for them until you park.

0

2 months ago

effort, hard, humor, park, people, realization, realize, ride, support
Twitter is basically everyone’s therapist’s couch.

0

2 months ago

couch, expression, health, humor, media, mental, mental health, online, online therapy, social, social media, therapist, therapy, Twitter
Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

0

2 months ago

before, childhood, drawing, family, fridge, furious, going, humor, internet, meant, nostalgia, sibling, viral
Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

0

2 months ago

cell, cell phone, company, give, give up, hold, hold music, humor, interest, jazz, lose, music, phone, play, smooth, smooth jazz, working

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Threads this month:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

13 shares on Threads this month:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

Are you http? Because I’m :// without you.

85 shares on Discord this month:

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

85 shares on WhatsApp this month:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

40 shares on Pinterest this month:

Tons of names in my phones are “Kenny Landlord,” “Mike Electric,” or “Pete Do Not Answer,” and I just realized this is how Anglo surnames have always worked.

67 shares on Threads this month:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m sorry I said “I look forward to working with you” during our wedding vows.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

Don’t wait until you’re on your death bed to let them know how you feel. You may be too weak to raise your middle finger.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Spongebob never let anyone dull his whimsical spirit.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If a woman watches a TV show alone, who answers all of her questions?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Well, at least my cat is supportive of me doing less and laying around more.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Just a friendly reminder folks. Don’t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,246

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

I have been so toxic and horny lately, I should probably start, like, reading a book or something.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Adulthood is really discovering half your family is mentally ill.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

This is your sign to cancel all work meetings today.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Imagine being in the Trojan horse with the lads, pure darkness and giggling like hehehe

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Staying weird for my own sanity.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Why would I want a memory pillow? Sleep is where I go to forget.

Live now on YouTube:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Girls will be like “it’s fine” then start drawing a pentagram in blood on their floorboards.

Spotted on Messenger:

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I hear the responses my young siblings give my mom, and I’m speechless; they don’t know the commando she was in her prime.

Trending via X:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

Trending via Facebook:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Live now on Instagram:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

The second date is you watching me parallel park and trying not to have a stroke.

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