Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

British people be like “I was born in E-sex, grew up in Woke Ham, moved to Man Chest Hair, went to uni in Rotten Stall.”

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I need a chiropractor for my brain.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

“I have a date with destiny.” Yeah well, I’m in a long-term relationship with the consequences of my actions.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Not to brag but I can chop an onion without crying. And I can cry without chopping an onion.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I always take responsibility for my actions when there is no one else around to blame.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,709

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The most realistic scene in Star Wars was when Darth Vader lost his cool during a staff meeting and used the force to choke a coworker.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Cigarette smell gotta be one of the worst smells in the history of smells.

Live now on Twitch:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Going bananas on WeChat:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

Donnie Darko was also ahead of its time because the guy’s haunted by a giant Labubu.

21 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, at least he didn't have to worry about carrot shortages 🥕😂🐰

ahead, ahead of time, darko, donnie, Donnie Darko, giant, guys, haunted, humor, Labubu, movie, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

0

2 months ago

good, humor, know, lyrics, misunderstanding, music, nostalgia, shit, sing, singing, sites, technology, teens, truth, used, wrong
If you’re gonna spend so much time in my head, would it kill you to tidy up a bit?

0

2 months ago

bit, clean, head, humor, kill, mind, much, spend, thoughts, tidy, time
I really thought impromptu dance-offs were going to be more common.

0

4 weeks ago

common, dance-off, expectation, going, humor, i, impromptu, interaction, social, social interaction, thought
In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

0

2 months ago

20s, 40s, activity, age, age difference, bangers, changes, club, difference, fun, fun activity, grocery, grocery store, hit, humor, life, life changes, listen, nightlife, store
We literally used to write an essay by hand.

0

4 months ago

education, essay, hand, handwriting, humor, literally, memory, nostalgia, old, old school, school, used, writing
But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

0

5 months ago

contradiction, good, humor, i, me, preference, relationship, self-awareness, someone, want

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Discord this month:

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

98 shares on Reddit this month:

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

81 shares on Instagram this month:

If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

47 shares on Threads this month:

I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

The sluttiest thing a man can do is have an ethical dilemma over his lust for you.

26 shares on Instagram this month:

When your name is Jenn, people think it’s short for Jennifer, but it’s really short for Jennatalia.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

69 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

Remember you are dust and, after you send this email, to dust you shall return.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

It’s so hot out, I just hydroplaned off the toilet seat at work.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Trying to be cute today but my face isn’t cooperating.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

I should’ve been a crow. They get to fly around looking goth as hell and seeking retribution. Instead, I have to go to an office and work on my ‘people skills.’

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Boobs always win. That’s why we don’t play rock, paper, boobs.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Eternal Sunshine of the Thotless Grind.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they’re dead.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

If you’re going to walk in my shoes, please also wear my FitBit.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

People moaning and making noise over food makes me so livid I can’t keep it in.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

Just shared via Telegram:

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m too lazy to be a superhero. If I had laser eyes, I’d probably just use them to heat soup or something.

Just landed via Telegram:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

Spotted on Threads:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I’m just saying, no dog has ever ghosted me.

Trending via Slack:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Just landed via Discord:

I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Donnie Darko was also ahead of its time because the guy’s haunted by a giant Labubu.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

If you’re gonna spend so much time in my head, would it kill you to tidy up a bit?

I really thought impromptu dance-offs were going to be more common.

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

We literally used to write an essay by hand.

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨