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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say “repairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

He probably follows so many women because he believes in elevating their voices.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

Just done a HIIT workout and if anyone sees me trying to do that again just go ahead and hiit me in the face.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

I grew up in a kinder, gentler age. We pitied our fools.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Imagine hating me while I’m just over here being lazy and minding my own business.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Sorry I can’t carpool to work. That’s the time I use to angry scream.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Damaged inside, but outside we keep it gangsta.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1783 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,945

Funny Quotes Topics

14,752

Funny Quotes Images

11,945

Updated

51 seconds ago

Users Online

3,452

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I know breakfastless behavior when I see it.

Making waves on Instagram:

I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.

Just shared via Twitch:

Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

Making waves on TikTok:

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Just landed via TikTok:

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I didn’t really feel old until my doctor hit me with the “at your age…”

Just landed via Threads:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Trending via Telegram:

I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1783 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,945

Funny Quotes Topics

14,752

Funny Quotes Images

11,945

Updated

51 seconds ago

Users Online

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Shutting up is gluten-free. Maybe add that to your diet, princess.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Note: Press the button on the elevator as often as possible to activate the secret express function and speed up the thing.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them, you should change them regularly, and you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Don’t worry. Artificial intelligence will never replace actual ignorance.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Whoever’s praying on my downfall, I appreciate you thinking of me.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m at the age where a house arrest no longer sounds like the worst thing.

Making waves on Telegram:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

Seen just now on Twitch:

“It is what it is,” I say, not really knowing what it actually is.

Reported on Messenger:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

Making waves on Threads:

I’m sorry that I’m canceling plans. I made them last week when I assumed that, by now, I’d be a different person.

Making waves on Snapchat:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Making waves on Messenger:

Venn diagrams. You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. Or you’re somewhere in the middle.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I love ketchup from my head to-ma-toes.

Trending via Twitch:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Seen just now on X:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

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