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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Uber drivers have secret access to a streaming service of exclusively the worst music you’ve ever heard.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Just saw a bird run across the street if you were wondering if anyone else is wasting their gifts.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

My kids want to know what’s for dinner, like they’re going to be happy with the answer.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

My parents grew to like my girlfriend so much, they take her as their own daughter. Now they started looking for a proper boyfriend for her.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

You ever notice how when you get home from food shopping, the kids turn into airport security?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they’re having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

242 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,511

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,511

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,633

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

Seen just now on Telegram:

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I’d like to shrink you down and add you to my keychain.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

A hammock is a terrible place to receive bad news.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

There’s a rhyming Italian expression for saying “take it or leave it” that goes “o mangi questa minestra o salti dalla finestra”. It means “either eat this soup or throw yourself out the window”.

Going viral on Instagram:

I love when women have one daughter as their only child. It’s so incredibly chic.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“Fox Mulder” is an aggressively sexy name.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I have determined there is no quiet way to get a pan out of a cabinet in the morning.

Funny beavis quotes

New funny beavis quotes 👇

We are so shocked by “Butthead” that we ignore the strangeness of the name “Beavis”.

0

2 months ago

beavis, butthead, humor, ignore, name, shock, shocked, strangeness, wordplay

Someone from 🇬🇧 has recently copied this quote.

47 shares on Slack this month.

All funny beavis quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Discord this month:

I need to eat healthier but donuts exist.

33 shares on Slack this month:

I forgot how to panic. Help!

98 shares on Instagram this month:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

11 shares on Threads this month:

Before I drink, I eat liver so the liquor won’t know which liver to attack.

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

14 shares on Threads this month:

I hope this email kills us both.

92 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve never used a semicolon with 100% confidence.

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

18 shares on Threads this month:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

63 shares on Messenger this month:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Female friendship is all about taking turns being insane. First, one of you is crazy, and the other has to counterbalance by being normal. Then, thirty minutes later, you get to trade.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Me, aged 20: This is internship summer. I will get an internship. I will find a job. I will study. I will read. I will learn piano. I will… Me, nowadays: This summer, I’m going to try all of the ice cream flavors.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t really do one-night stands, but I will do, like, 3-8 months of a semi-toxic, undefined relationship that wastes my time and ruins my life.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I need an emergency cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

I’m at the age where an uncomfortable bed will have me injured for a couple of days.

Trending via Threads:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Live now on Telegram:

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Trending via Discord:

Middle-aged math is going out drinking and feeling half your age then waking up the next morning feeling twice your age.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Even on the coldest of days, there’s such peace found in the warm embrace of a hot pizza.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I can resist everything except temptation.

Just landed via TikTok:

At the plastic surgeon: Please, Doc, help me. My Barbie doll has appendicitis.

Just shared via Twitch:

Just paid my rent, now I have a warm place to starve in.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny beavis quotes

New funny beavis quotes 👇

We are so shocked by “Butthead” that we ignore the strangeness of the name “Beavis”.

All funny beavis quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨