Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

Phone so dry, I caught myself checking the weather.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

This flight is so long, I don’t know where I’m going anymore. I just live here now. Even the crying baby gave up.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Of course, a wife can complain to her mother-in-law. She has every right to complain to the manufacturer.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Some people stay in the past because that’s where they peaked.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,561

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Carrying a baby for nine months and then naming it Chet is insane.

Just landed via Discord:

If chickens knew how good they tasted, they would understand.

Breaking via Slack:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

Just shared via Facebook:

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

Going bananas on Slack:

“You replied so quickly.” God forbid I wait like a dog to hear from you again.

Trending via Twitch:

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“You’re in her DMs, my faint presence sits in her Spotify Wrapped through the music I introduced her to. We’re not the same.”

Just shared via Slack:

I hate it when what’s wrong asks me what’s wrong.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Live now on TikTok:

Dear Aliens, Now would be a good time. Thanks!

Funny begging quotes

Funny begging quotes bring a hilarious twist to the art of asking with a sprinkle of wit and charm 😂🙌. Whether you’re pleading for a favor or just making someone smile, these clever lines turn desperation into pure comedy gold 💬✨. Get ready to laugh and maybe even master the most entertaining way to say please! 😜🎉

New funny begging quotes 👇

All funny begging quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on Instagram this month:

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Y’all pronounce it data or data?

14 shares on TikTok this month:

Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

68 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Meds have done more for me than any man ever could.

25 shares on YouTube this month:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

67 shares on Discord this month:

Just rolled over for a cuddle.. forgot I’m single… fell off the bed.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

19 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m so old, I still drink my coffee at home in the morning. From a real cup.

12 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Imagine you and me as cows in Switzerland, enjoying the view and saying “moo” every day.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Cowboy outfits should be called ranch dressing.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

As a parent you get to see just how much a baby accomplishes in its first year of life. Because you’re awake for all of it.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,492

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Pugs look like regular dogs that ran into a door at full speed.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Foot fetish should just be called feetish.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t push people away, I just do the Macarena.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Gaslighting myself into thinking I’m in a good mood.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

In the American Bible, Eve was made from part of a McRib.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I’m only here while I wait for that Nigerian prince to follow through on his end of the bargain.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Breaking via Discord:

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

Spotted on Slack:

Sorry I slowed down but I had to calculate if the bridge could hold the weight of my car with all the stuffed animals my kids insisted on bringing on vacation.

Just shared via Threads:

It’s normal that my retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding buried treasure at some point, right?

Making waves on Pinterest:

All of my passwords are protected by short-term memory loss.

Trending via YouTube:

If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

Going viral on YouTube:

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

Just shared via Threads:

They should name a personality disorder after me.

Trending via Discord:

If you’re a dude and you’re having a bad day, just remember, no one cares.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Youngest siblings are literally weaponized incompetence, final boss.

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