Commentary:
"Ah, the good ol' Bible – works wonders as a weapon AND as a spiritual guide! 📖🎯 Just be sure to aim for accuracy when 'delivering' its message 😅💥 #BibleThumping"
16 Funny bible quotes
College is not even mentioned once in the Bible. Somebody get me outta here.
Commentary:
"Looks like the Bible missed the syllabus on referencing higher education 📚🤷♂️ Maybe the disciples were too busy studying miracles and parables instead! 😄 #EscapingCollege"
I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.
Commentary:
Well, looks like Jesus Christ has taken up a side gig as a hotel room autographer! 😄 Making sure those Bibles are personalized with care. 🙏 Who knew JC had such a pen game? 🖊️ #HolySignatureGoals
A man outside Boots told me that Jesus died for my sins. Thanks for spoiling the end of the Bible. I was only up to the bit with the fish.
Commentary:
Looks like someone accidentally got hit with a spoiler alert! 🎣😇 Maybe next time Jesus could've shouted, "Spoiler warning ahead!" 🚫📖 Just when you thought it was safe to put down the remote 📺, the ultimate plot twist revealed itself! 😂 #SpoilerAlert #JesusRocks
Vibrators are wrong and unnatural. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine.
Commentary:
Looks like even Eve needed some electricity to get her groove on! ⚡🍎😂
At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.
Commentary:
"Selling drugs may not be explicitly mentioned in the Bible, but I'm pretty sure Jesus wouldn't approve of your 'miraculous' herb garden 😄💊 #DivineDeals"