Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Captain America taught me that I just need to take performance enhancing drugs to be loved by everyone.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

“I don’t care!”, he posted, again.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,358

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I’ve used dark mode so much that I’m physically repulsed by white screens now.

Just shared via Slack:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Nothing more dangerous than an ignorant man who thinks he is a genius.

Live now on WeChat:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Going bananas on Threads:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.

Just shared via Telegram:

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Hmm, that’s a bit too harsh. Let me put “lol” at the end of it.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

You know you’re a bad cook when the dog won’t lick the plate.

Seen just now on Discord:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Funny D quotes

Funny D quotes are here to brighten your day with a splash of humor and a dash of wit 😄🎉 Whether you need a clever pun, a quirky one-liner, or just some lighthearted fun, these gems will have you laughing out loud 😂🔥 Get ready to share smiles and spread good vibes—because who doesn’t love a good laugh with a twist of D? 😜✨

New funny D quotes 👇

All funny D quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Slack this month:

When you get angry, take a breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. Nobody expects that.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m looking for a moisturizer to hide the fact that I’ve been tired since 2010.

54 shares on TikTok this month:

Not to brag but this cashier is checking me out.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

25 shares on LinkedIn this month:

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

This is not an empty room, this is a very successful anti-party.

100 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

Just remembered I can just get drunk after work instead of quitting. That was a close one.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I had to quit my job because people kept falling in love with me there.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I wasn’t made to hustle and bustle. I was made to dilly and dally.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

The older I get, the more I realize that being rushed by someone is a form of manipulation.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I like that linguists chose the term ‘loan words,’ implying that one day we’ll get them back.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,670

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Job applications be like “how did you hear about us?”. Bro why, was it a secret?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

All the world’s a stage, and I always forget my line.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Interpretive dance is the best way to answer stupid questions.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

The second cup of coffee does for me what a can of spinach does for Popeye.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

For financial reasons, I will be passing away.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I’m sorry to break it to you, but you need a soul to have a soulmate.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Crazy part about being an overthinker is most times you right.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

I took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The only traditional costume people around me wear is sweatpants.

Trending via Discord:

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

Just shared via TikTok:

There’s a disconnect between the decibel level of my car singing and my talent.

Trending via Instagram:

I’ve got 99 problems. I know this because I wake up in the middle of the night to review each and every one of them in great detail.

Going viral on Threads:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

Trending via Messenger:

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Going bananas on Telegram:

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

Spotted on Facebook:

Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

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