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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

It’s been a pleasure miscommunicating with you.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Breaking news: you’re way less interesting than you think you are.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Girls be like “forget it, I’m fine” then set your house on fire.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

My brain is 80% song lyrics.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Judging by the hair on my couch, I’m surprised I have any cat left at all.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

I really want to be nice, but annoying people just won’t let me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2332 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,494

Funny Quotes Topics

15,196

Funny Quotes Images

12,494

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

I was going to do some yoga today, but had a donut instead.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Just landed via Threads:

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

Going viral on Facebook:

Good morning to everyone — except me, because I clearly didn’t get enough sleep.

Just landed via Facebook:

I like to swear a lot so that people will keep their kids away from me.

Reported on TikTok:

People that I dislike shouldn’t be allowed to consume the media that I like.

Spotted on Threads:

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Just landed via Twitch:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2332 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,494

Funny Quotes Topics

15,196

Funny Quotes Images

12,494

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I have so many mood swings, I’m basically a swing now.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

If you’re just talking nonsense all the time and not thinking about what you’re doing, you’re either in love or at the office.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

Parenthood is so crazy. We’re really out here getting bullied by the people we made.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Stealing hoodies is for amateurs. Steal his car like a real woman.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

I am thick and tired.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

The struggle to get off the couch and into bed is real.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Reported on Messenger:

I’m just a Whole Foods girl on a Walmart budget.

Just shared via Pinterest:

When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it’s illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Reverse cowgirl, so we can both address the elephant in the room.

Shared recently on Discord:

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?

Seen just now on WeChat:

Everyone is celebrating my vegan Bolognese sauce. The secret ingredient is minced meat.

Seen just now on Threads:

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Babymaking music but it’s the Benny Hill theme song.

Making waves on Reddit:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

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