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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

If we’re not supposed to be snacking late at night why is there a light in the fridge?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I accidentally said “large” instead of “venti” at Starbucks and now the cops are here.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

I’m going to get some steel wool so I can crochet myself a new car.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Why do women complain about size but moan when fingered?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Monday: The only day when you can wear the same outfit from the day before without anyone noticing.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

You don’t know your own leg strength until you’re kicking the end of a hotel tucked bed sheet.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

30 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

No one told me adulthood would require this much multi-factor authentication.

Shared recently on TikTok:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Going viral on Facebook:

If you lift the cat off the couch and it sounds like Velcro, then it didn’t want to leave.

Breaking via Reddit:

Some people get weird as they get older. Not me, though. I’ve always been weird.

Just landed via YouTube:

Duolingo should have an “I’m going on holiday to this place very soon” setting so it teaches you “can I have the bill” and so on instead of “the cow boils an egg”.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m not like other girls. I don’t have a podcast.

Just shared via Facebook:

Cloud 9 is a very high place to fall from.

Just shared via Facebook:

I have no desire to rekindle anything with anyone. See you never.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Seen just now on Discord:

“Are you okay?” No, it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

30 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, I’m giving you a wedgie.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I have tasted employment, I have tasted joblessness and I recommend generational wealth guys.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Clearing her mind with a brisk walk along the foggy shoreline.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure this Santa-shaped chocolate oughta settle my stomach.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Shared recently on Discord:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Just landed via Threads:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I also want them to get lice.

Just landed via Reddit:

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

Live now on Threads:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’ve just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I just need to get over everything that has happened to me in my entire life and then we can hang out.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I had a dream about you. You were stupid there, too.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

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