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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Since there are no other Vulcans on the enterprise and the crew has no comparison, Spock could be and probably is bullshitting them most of the time.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

I’m very loyal to whatever brand is on sale.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

I’m going to break into your house and steal that thing with the little wheels on it under the plate in your microwave.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Occupation: the ugly friend!

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, Guantanamo Bay.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

If you give a man a fish, that fish is basically gone. Way to lose your fish.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My Mom asks why everything is on the floor, like she never heard of gravity.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Live now on TikTok:

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Going viral on YouTube:

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

Seen just now on X:

Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

Making waves on Reddit:

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

Just shared via Slack:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Live now on Threads:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Freshly posted on X:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

Home » Funny Hanging On Quotes

Funny hanging on quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,435

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says “oh, you want to see crazy?” Reassure her that you do not.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

If you think someone has put a spell on you, send me $500 and I’ll get rid of it.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

You want me to turn around? The thing that led to a total eclipse of the heart.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

I will never stop being a quitter!

Just shared via Reddit:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Seen just now on Messenger:

You okay, babe? You’ve hardly touched the promises you made me.

Freshly posted on X:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

Making waves on Telegram:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Spotted on X:

I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Just landed via TikTok:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Just shared via TikTok:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Broadcasted on Slack:

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

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