Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

I’m done wasting money this summer, unless you guys want to do something this weekend.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Old age is always 15 years older than I am.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Study so hard until Dior is like Shein to you.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

In the American Bible, Eve was made from part of a McRib.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Mr. Beast is like if they made Dubai into a person.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I wish I was a moose. No work, no school, just eating grass and wrecking cars.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,391

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

At my age, I’m more frightened of a hip break than a heartbreak.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

Making waves on YouTube:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Just landed via Reddit:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Be the reason someone smiles today. Or blocks you. Whatever.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Easy there, unsaved number.

Just landed via YouTube:

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

Funny haunting film quotes

New funny haunting film quotes 👇

All funny haunting film quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Reddit this month:

69. Some might call it nasty. I call it a romantic dinner for 2.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

At the end of the day, it’s just me and me.

16 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m not religious but I know there’s a hell because Monopoly exists.

67 shares on Slack this month:

Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them, you should change them regularly, and you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.

89 shares on Twitch this month:

If you can’t handle me at my worst, then honestly, you’re missing out because that’s when my jokes and bits get really, really good.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Your 20s are for developing attachments to people who will haunt you for the rest of your life.

83 shares on Reddit this month:

Got the zoomies at work, and now HR is chasing me around with a butterfly net.

82 shares on Discord this month:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

71 shares on Discord this month:

time heals all wounds.” Wrong! Time is chasing me with a knife.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The title of my autobiography is going to be ‘You’d Think I’d Learn By Now, But Nope.’

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry if my posts have any typos, it’s because I’m driving.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

What does international law say about a third Margarita?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Parents may forget many things, but they never forget who brought the noisy toys into the house.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever feel like you’re adulting, but only on the outside? Inside, you’re just a kid hoping someone else will make dinner.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,710

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Humanity was engineered as a biological weapon but left abandoned early in its development.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

There is nothing worse in life than calling customer service and hearing an Indian accent.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Nothing tops a plain pizza.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

I need to figure out what I’m going to wear to the couch on New Year’s Eve.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Welcome to middle age, where you wake up hungover whether you’ve had a drink or not.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

A good audiobook will have you inventing chores to do.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via X:

The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

Just landed via Snapchat:

The fact it costs $15 to get a basic meal at a fast-food restaurant now is comical.

Trending via Twitch:

“What’s your ETA?” do you ask the birds in the sky when they will arrive.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Sometimes I say “huh,” then answer the question before you can repeat your question.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Do you ever feel like you’re a white shirt and life is a red wine?

Making waves on WeChat:

Ever feel like you’re adulting, but only on the outside? Inside, you’re just a kid hoping someone else will make dinner.

Spotted on WeChat:

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

Making waves on Facebook:

You don’t need to be a good listener as long as you’re a good nodder.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

They should invent a man who is being genuine when he says things to me.

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