Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

“In a galaxy far, far away” is starting to sound quite enticing.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Chill, folks, it’s just a simulation.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Glad I didn’t really waste any time studying international law, seeing as how it is fake and meaningless.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Whatever doesn’t kill you is probably still trying.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Today in who needs an alarm: my kid woke me up early by scream-whispering WHAT IS DUST?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

235 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,504

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,504

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,533

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Threads:

After weeks of using an anti aging cream, I can now proudly say: I now have very well-maintained wrinkles.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

Just shared via Pinterest:

All the smart people at the office are worried about being replaced by A.I., but not me. I’m safe until they invent Artificial Stupidity.

Going viral on Threads:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Just shared via Messenger:

I simply accept my extreme loneliness as punishment for something I did in a past life, and don’t worry about it.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I want to become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Schedule your bikini wax for the first thing in the morning, and you won’t need that cup of coffee.

Shared recently on Threads:

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

Spotted on Discord:

I dreamed I won the lottery, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up and get ready for work.

Funny headless quotes

Funny headless quotes 🧠🚫 are the perfect mix of spooky and silly that’ll make you laugh out loud! Whether you love Halloween vibes 🎃 or just enjoy quirky humor, these headless gems will tickle your funny bone in the most unexpected way. Get ready for some head-turning laughs that are anything but ordinary! 😂💀 #HeadlessHumor #LaughOutLoud

New funny headless quotes 👇

All funny headless quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on YouTube this month:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

99 shares on Messenger this month:

Not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergusting right now.

53 shares on X this month:

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

25 shares on WeChat this month:

Showing up late with an iced coffee is not about poor time management, it’s about knowing how to make an entrance.

28 shares on WeChat this month:

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

62 shares on Reddit this month:

Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.

51 shares on X this month:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

31 shares on Slack this month:

They say it is hard to look at lips that you are not allowed to kiss. You do not know how hard it is to look at a face that you are not allowed to hit.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m like Pooh Bear. I just want to eat, hang with my homies, and go around pantsless.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like to have the peace of mind of a cow. I already have the body.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m on this new diet where I don’t consume anything that talks to me before the first coffee.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The second date is you watching me parallel park and trying not to have a stroke.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

235 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,504

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,504

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,432

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

At some point, I need to admit my ‘guilty pleasure’ music taste is just my music taste now.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I accidentally said “large” instead of “venti” at Starbucks and now the cops are here.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

I am stoned and laying in bed reading, and the idea of Santa going on Ozempic popped into my head, and I whispered, “No!”

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, if you could take some stuffing out of the midsection and give it a little forehead kiss, that would be great.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Wanted to update everybody on my diet. I’ve decided it’s okay to be fat.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Hold music is annoyingly scratchy and repetitive on purpose, so you will hang up and stop bothering them.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

On Twitter, you will always find someone who is tweeting your thoughts but with better grammar.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Today is one of those days that even my coffee needs a coffee.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

Going viral on Discord:

Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

Trending via YouTube:

This is an awful time to be an educated person.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My career plan? Win the lottery and disappear.

Going viral on Discord:

My handwriting got like five different fonts, depends on my mood and the pen I’m using.

Spotted on Telegram:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here eating Nutella from the jar with a spoon.

Spotted on Threads:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

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