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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early, if you ask me.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Your honor, my client doesn’t like jail.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Whoever said “out of sight out of mind” never lost a spider in the bedroom.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

I knew I had issues when motivational speakers started to irritate me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

819 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,981

Funny Quotes Topics

13,924

Funny Quotes Images

10,981

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

Making waves on TikTok:

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Reported on Facebook:

I’m not feeling very worky today.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Trending via TikTok:

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Santa punched a hole in my wall because I left him soy milk.

Making waves on Discord:

In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

Going viral on X:

How to write complaints: “Dear customer service, first of all, you should know that I am typing this with my middle finger.”

Shared recently on X:

My Native American name would be Smokes Cigarettes.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

819 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,981

Funny Quotes Topics

13,924

Funny Quotes Images

10,981

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Hanging out with your parents as an adult is so interesting, cause it’s like, “Oh, so that’s why I’m like this.”

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Some people can’t sleep because they have insomnia. I can’t sleep because I have Internet.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

“Huh” is 94% of my vocabulary.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

I miss when we didn’t know what celebrities thought about anything.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Some people’s laughs are funnier than the joke.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI get absolutely no work done and then throw their coworker under the bus as soon as their boss asks about it.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

This coffee isn’t working. Think I need holy water.

Spotted on Telegram:

To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

Seen just now on Instagram:

If I shook my head at every stupid thing I saw, I’d have permanent whiplash.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

What bootlickers fail to understand is that the boot eventually comes for them too.

Going viral on X:

Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Reported on Threads:

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I hope this is the year my teen learns how to turn off a light when she leaves a room.

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