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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

One of the worst ways to waste your youth is by being insecure.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I love surprising my metabolism. It never knows what’s coming—either absolute starvation or 1,000+ calories all at once.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I changed my Facebook name to “Benefits.” Now, when people add me, it says, “You are now friends with benefits.”

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

You’re never alone. There’s mold.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

I love convincing myself iced coffee counts as hydration and self-care.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

I am under no obligation to make sense to you.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,319

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

Sometimes I wonder if the strangers I see when I go outside are actually the people I talk to online.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

Just landed via WeChat:

I got 99 problems and money could solve at least 69 of them.

Making waves on Messenger:

And to my grandchildren, I leave my unread PDFs.

Going viral on Slack:

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

Just shared via YouTube:

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Get off the apps. Sleep with someone in your friend group. Add an awkward tension every time you hang out with them.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Sorry if my posts have any typos, it’s because I’m driving.

Just shared via Reddit:

Time machine? You mean a clock?

Going viral on Messenger:

I lied, there’s no sex. I just needed help getting out of my skinny jeans.

Funny low self-esteem quotes

New funny low self-esteem quotes 👇

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

1 month ago

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All funny low self-esteem quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Facebook this month:

Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

43 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

75 shares on X this month:

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

95 shares on Slack this month:

Better to be an overthinker than an overdrinker.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

18 shares on Discord this month:

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

86 shares on LinkedIn this month:

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

26 shares on Pinterest this month:

Kiss me like you’re trying to damn my soul and save it in the same breath.

16 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m sorry for inventing the universe.

13 shares on X this month:

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

According to your ex, what’s exactly wrong with you?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

The most important thing I learned in life, and I can’t stress enough, it doesn’t matter where you went to college. The only thing that matters is that you’re really hot.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

I have a huge to-do list, I just have to figure out who’s gonna do it.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there is an increased chance that they will see you later.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Really just want to meet someone who knows what songs not to talk over.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

My DNA came back saying I come from a wide selection of cheeses.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I’m on a spinning rock in outer space, and I have to answer work emails.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Just landed via Discord:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

Spotted on Twitch:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Making waves on Discord:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Making waves on WeChat:

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

Just shared via Facebook:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

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Funny low self-esteem quotes

New funny low self-esteem quotes 👇

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

All funny low self-esteem quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

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