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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

The lion can’t keep living like this.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Whoops, accidentally said I couldn’t make it before they even said the date.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Cheer up! Your biggest mistake is probably still ahead of you.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

The cold water does not get warmer if you jump late.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

823 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,985

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,985

46 minutes ago

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

Trending via Facebook:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Just shared via Discord:

I have determined there is no quiet way to get a pan out of a cabinet in the morning.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Whenever you feel like the world is falling apart, take a deep breath and remember you’re right.

Trending via Discord:

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

Reported on LinkedIn:

You can be anything when you grow up. For instance, I am very tired.

Live now on Threads:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

Going viral on Instagram:

You can’t spell fries without friends. I guess what I’m saying is that fries are friends. Delicious friends.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Home » Funny Maim Quotes

Funny maim quotes

New funny maim quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Commentary:
"Who knew party planning could also involve a hint of danger? 🎉🤕 Just remember, swinging blindfolded at a piñata might lead to some unintentional dodgeball skills! 🎊⚾️"

For even more funny maim quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny maim quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

823 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,985

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,985

46 minutes ago

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

The man who invented the Ferris wheel never met the man who invented the merry-go-round. They traveled in different circles.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Might start signing off emails with ‘well, I hope you’re happy’

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

If I go missing and you put my weight on that poster, I swear I’m not coming back.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Coffee should be free for everyone Monday through Friday.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

It’s important to listen to both sides of the debate because you need to hear both the reality of the situation and also the dumbest thing anyone’s ever said.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I can already feel that the day is going to seize me instead of the other way around.

Just shared via Slack:

Babymaking music but it’s the Benny Hill theme song.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Shared recently on Slack:

Mount Rushmore would be way more American if all the presidents were eating.

Just shared via WeChat:

Spending 5 minutes looking up every word I want to use in a sentence to make sure I can define it in case they ask.

Spotted on X:

I’m sorry I pretended I was dead when I saw you in public.

Trending via Messenger:

I’m just saying, no dog has ever ghosted me.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I had big plans to sleep in today, but my bladder canceled.

Spotted on Threads:

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have started asking humans to prove that they are not robots.

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