Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on the bus do not go round and round.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

America is like that TV show that’s been on for too long, and the writers don’t know what to do, so they just make anything happen.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I hurt my bottom after shaking it at the office party. It was a twerk-place injury.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I wish I had a friend like me.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,346

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Slack:

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

Shared recently on Telegram:

People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

Just shared via Instagram:

One day you burned a CD for the last time and didn’t even realize it.

Going viral on Telegram:

Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

Trending via YouTube:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I enjoy long, romantic walks … to the departure gate.

Spotted on Telegram:

I love people who are fluent in Spongebob references.

Going bananas on X:

As a kid, I was worried about randomly disappearing into the Bermuda Triangle forever. As an adult, I’m wondering how I can actually make that happen.

Just landed via YouTube:

You don’t get to tell me what to do, you’re not my cat.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched the argument I baited you with.

Funny name call quotes

New funny name call quotes 👇

At the doctor’s office, booing all the names being called that aren’t mine.

1 month ago

appointment, being, booing, call, doctor, doctor office, doctors, humor, mine, name, name call, names, office, patient, room, waiting, waiting room

All funny name call quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Slack this month:

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

79 shares on Reddit this month:

People my age are parenting actual humans, and I’m over here promising myself snacks if I fold the laundry.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

They expect me to work at work.

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

48 shares on WeChat this month:

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please put some money in its pocket.

40 shares on X this month:

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Spending the day with my mom and her mom, just observing the patterns.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

It’s actually scary how your whole life depends on how well you did as a teenager.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

“Do you like using Twitter?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

I’m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

My life is a movie, and it has a 47% on Rotten Tomatoes.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

This generation of men makes celibacy so easy for women.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Good morning to the wind beneath my wings only.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

Freshly posted on Slack:

If you ever feel stupid, just remember there are people who forgive cheating.

Going viral on Facebook:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Life is way too short to pretend you’re not into some freaky stuff.

Just shared via Messenger:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Proudly doing my part to cause the male loneliness epidemic.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Work for a living? In this economy?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny name call quotes

New funny name call quotes 👇

At the doctor’s office, booing all the names being called that aren’t mine.

All funny name call quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨