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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I’m not exaggerating when I say, if I ever clogged a toilet at work, I would immediately quit, change my name, and then move to a different city.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

I don’t think you all understand. If Taylor Swift didn’t have a private jet, she’d be Taylor Slow.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

“You handled that with such grace” are words that have never been spoken to me.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

In America we have marijuana. In France they have oui’d.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

You don’t have to check your Spotify Wrapped, you are the most played this year.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Laziness is the art to rest before one gets tired.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

Going viral on Threads:

Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

Seen just now on TikTok:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Going viral on Snapchat:

And for my next trick, I will appear to know what I’m doing.

Breaking via Twitch:

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

Going viral on Discord:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Just landed via Reddit:

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3am coming back from the club.

Trending via WeChat:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

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Funny natural intelligence quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I have browser tabs open that are older than you.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

The ways printers are like kids: Need feeding, are noisy and can’t function when offline.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I like you because we hate the same people.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

As long as I can dip something in something, I’m happy.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

I’m at that point in my life where if a car hit me, I’d probably say thank you to the kind stranger.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Love is in the air, but so is the flu. Wash your hands!

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

Just landed via Facebook:

I forgot the word “espresso” so I asked the barista for a smaller, angrier coffee.

Spotted on Reddit:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Freshly posted on X:

An app where you and your partner swipe left and right on restaurants until there’s a match. No talking, no negotiation. Who’s building this?

Breaking via Slack:

Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.

Reported on Instagram:

I don’t wanna be dramatic but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Trending via Snapchat:

Don’t let me drive if you’re gonna scream every time we almost die.

Trending via YouTube:

The main problem is that far too many people have far too easy access to podcast equipment.

Seen just now on Facebook:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Just shared via Instagram:

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

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