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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Keep your friends close, but your smartphone closer.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Look, ice cream has eggs in it, therefore it is a breakfast food.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I put the “pro” in procrastinate.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

The dumbest people have the loudest opinions on politics.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

I would go out of my mind, but I can’t find the exit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

Updated

34 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

Do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

Making waves on Instagram:

A vibrator is amazing but it doesn’t call me “good girl” unfortunately.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Just landed via WeChat:

More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Life is so funny because you think you look good today and a year later you look even better.

Just landed via X:

The toddler refers to every baby as Baby [Name], like Baby is their formal title.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I hate it when I’m at work and someone asks “are you at free at the moment?”. Please expand further so I can know if I’m free or not.

Home » Funny Nightly Quotes

Funny nightly quotes

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All funny nightly quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

Updated

34 minutes ago

Users Online

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Seriously, how sexy was Freud’s mom?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Why a bug would spend such a long fraction of its short life immobile on my ceiling beats me.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

I assume my soulmate has sold his soul to the devil.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I feel useless, but then I remember I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

In banana years, I am bread.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

I no longer dislike Mondays, I’m mature now… I dislike the whole week.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.

Just landed via Slack:

The goal is never Gucci bags. It’s acres of land.

Just shared via X:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Breaking via Telegram:

Ugh, he wants to go hiking as a first date, just like Hitler.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Here’s a question for all the mind readers out there.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

Spotted on Instagram:

Befuddlingly, a palm tree won’t fit in your hand.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I’m going to need to speak with the flowers about this.

Trending via TikTok:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

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