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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Everyone’s a badass until the doorbell rings.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

The hardest thing about chess is the other guy is always doing some shit.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

I have a question and my question is, how can I look so cute in the mirror but like such a baked potato in pictures?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen and meowing at them until they give me treats.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

I don’t hate anyone in particular, I just hate everyone in general.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Sleeping in is the most efficient way to find out which morning rituals you can actually do without.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2429 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,591

Funny Quotes Topics

15,261

Funny Quotes Images

12,591

49 minutes ago

3,452

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Is there really anything worse than being forced to watch a video on someone else’s phone and having to pretend to laugh for 2 minutes?

Trending via Twitch:

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

Making waves on Slack:

There’s nothing more satisfying than the little nap you have after hitting snooze on your alarm.

Just landed via X:

The secret to my success is everywhere I go I wear a shirt that says STAFF on the back.

Reported on YouTube:

I found my first grey pubic hair today, but I didn’t freak out; unlike everyone else in the Zoom meeting.

Reported on TikTok:

I’ve surpassed the need for coffee, for I have evolved into a higher state of awesome.

Trending via X:

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Making waves on Twitch:

For Valentine’s Day, I’m gift-wrapping a shirt my husband hasn’t worn in years. It’s the thought that counts—and technically, I thought of it twice.

Home » Funny Notify Quotes

Funny notify quotes

New funny notify quotes 👇

4 months ago
Share →: In filling out an application, where it says, “In case of emergency notify”, I put “Doctor.”

Commentary:
"When it comes to emergencies, it's always better to be over-prepared, right? I guess this person believes in the power of preventive medicine – why wait for an emergency when you can have a doctor on speed dial?"

For even more funny notify quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny notify quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2429 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,591

Funny Quotes Topics

15,261

Funny Quotes Images

12,591

49 minutes ago

3,459

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

“I don’t care!”, he posted, again.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Family guy is so insane, because why were people dating that dog?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

If my toddler doesn’t sleep again tonight, I’m running away into the forest.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I had no idea being an adult would involve so many lotions.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Christmas is coming and you’re not.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Congrats to my tween for graduating at the top of his class from eye roll university.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WeChat:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Live now on X:

Pretty sure the guy in front of me at McDonald’s ordered the rest of the food.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Who is this Rorschach guy and where did he get all the pictures of my parents fighting?

Just landed via X:

You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

“I thought it might be nice to go round the room and say a bit about ourselves.” Oh dear, you thought wrong.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Some things are better left unsaid, unless you’re on X.

Just shared via Reddit:

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

Live now on Twitch:

Growing old is a process of saying “it’s probably nothing,” with increasing frequency and increasingly being wrong.

Going viral on YouTube:

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I think God was high when he made me.

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