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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

“I thought it might be nice to go round the room and say a bit about ourselves.” Oh dear, you thought wrong.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

If you haven’t tried blindfold archery, you should give it a go. You don’t know what you’re missing.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Can’t. Inventing new things to worry about.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Deleting dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way (he and his donkey rescue me from a tower guarded by a dragon).

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Seeing people exercising outside my house really motivated me to get up and close the blinds.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

If you call me “daddy” in bed, I will immediately stop what we are doing and make you clean your room.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,452

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

When the client says: “make it pop”, I have to ask myself whether he means my mind or the project.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

Just shared via TikTok:

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

Just shared via X:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

Trending via Twitch:

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

Shared recently on Slack:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Just landed via Twitch:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

Shared recently on YouTube:

You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

Trending via X:

At some point, I need to admit my ‘guilty pleasure’ music taste is just my music taste now.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I’m not bothered if you don’t like me, awesomeness isn’t for everyone.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I hate when an old man tries to friend me on Facebook and then I realize we went to high school together.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I hate it when what’s wrong asks me what’s wrong.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I was thinking of becoming self employed, but due to cutbacks, I can’t afford to hire me right now.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

I leave the blue tick on WhatsApp so that people can see exactly when I wasn’t interested.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Shared recently on Telegram:

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Tried to be a responsible adult today. Won’t be doing that again.

Making waves on Messenger:

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Going viral on TikTok:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Did you guys hear about the “internet”? Apparently, you can say literally anything there.

Shared recently on Slack:

In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.

Just landed via Instagram:

The paintings I always like the most in museums are the ones that have a bench.

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