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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and share if you agree.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

No one told me middle age would be so fuzzy, and if you are wondering whether I mean my eyesight or my facial hair, yes.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

How great is it to do absolutely nothing and follow it up by taking a rest.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I like people who make eye contact like they know something I don’t.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

The main cause of immigration is we’re still a country where people want to go, but we’re working on fixing that.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2413 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,575

Funny Quotes Topics

15,244

Funny Quotes Images

12,575

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Scratching the mosquito bite on my foot? Literally orgasmic. This is the kind of stuff that the government doesn’t want you to know.

Trending via YouTube:

There needs to be a separate grocery store for people who actually know what they’re doing.

Making waves on X:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Just landed via Discord:

If I could have immunity to anything I would pick calories.

Making waves on Reddit:

Sorry I missed your call 8 months ago. Is everything okay?

Trending via TikTok:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Just shared via Reddit:

My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2413 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,575

Funny Quotes Topics

15,244

Funny Quotes Images

12,575

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

I found out my wife was cheating on me at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert, and I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

You know the nap is good when it left you marks.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

The most annoying child in our house is that of my mother-in-law.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

I lied, there’s no sex. Stand over there and tell me if this painting I’m hanging is straight.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

I’m not feeling very worky today.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Some people feel like unpaid actors in my sitcom called “What Fresh Chaos Is This?”

Making waves on WeChat:

Gonna take the kids to the planetarium so they can watch YouTube on their phones.

Live now on Instagram:

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

Trending via Twitch:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

Breaking via Discord:

Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’ve added lunges to my workout routine. It’s a big step forward.

Going viral on Reddit:

I tell people I rearrange my furniture to change things up, but we all know it’s to annoy my husband.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

Shared recently on WeChat:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Freshly posted on X:

Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

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