Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

This simulation is no longer boring, since they replaced management.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Everyone’s a gangster until it’s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,691

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WeChat:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Spotted on Slack:

Perfume is key, but deodorant is keyer and showering is keyest.

Shared recently on Twitch:

If I had a boyfriend, I’d watch him dig a hole at the beach and be like, “Wowww, baby, good job. That’s a beautiful hole.

Going viral on TikTok:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Seen just now on X:

Honestly, I don’t even play an active role in my life any more. Things just happen and I’m like “I guess this is what we’re doing now.”

Breaking via TikTok:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Just landed via Slack:

The most important thing to remember when driving is that not everyone is smart.

Spotted on Facebook:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

When physical labor became optional, we invented the gym. We’ll need the same thing for the mind.

101 Funny texting quotes

More funny texting quotes 👇

Your birthday as an adult mainly consists of texting back ‘Thanks!’ to people you haven’t talked to in 5 years.

3 months ago

5, adult, back, birthday, communication, humor, interaction, media, nostalgia, people, social, social interaction, social media, texting, thanks

For even more funny texting quotes, hit next 👇

All funny texting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on Facebook this month:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Sometimes I delete a post because I remember I’m too old for it.

92 shares on Reddit this month:

The real flex is how many wounds you can turn into wisdom.

77 shares on Slack this month:

Called in telepathically this morning, so they know I’m thinking of them.

66 shares on Pinterest this month:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

22 shares on Telegram this month:

The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

Introverts be like “I know a place”, then go home.

83 shares on Instagram this month:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

36 shares on TikTok this month:

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Word on the street is that the fire in your heart is out.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Since it’s impossible to know which period of my life is the middle, I’ve decided to have an ongoing crisis.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

Shared recently on X:

I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Showing my barber a picture of a dinosaur.

Just landed via Messenger:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

Making waves on YouTube:

Straight man stuns they/them by ordering in fluent woke.

Breaking via Twitch:

Getting an entry-level job before the release of ChatGPT in 2022 was like taking the last chopper out of Vietnam. Few realize this yet.

Trending via WeChat:

How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

Going viral on Instagram:

“Love is in the air.” Wrong. Microplastics.

Making waves on WeChat:

Welcome to your 50s: You’re not attracted to anyone who likes you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

101 Funny texting quotes

More funny texting quotes 👇

Your birthday as an adult mainly consists of texting back ‘Thanks!’ to people you haven’t talked to in 5 years.

All funny texting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨