Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Having a sore throat as a giraffe must really suck.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Ginger ale is the champagne of soda.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Every time you break spaghetti noodles in half, an Italian has a stroke.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Stop making Fast and Furious movies.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Sorry, I can’t come over tonight. I’ve become too invested in these fictional characters and whether or not they will kiss.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

How do I tell someone respectfully to die in a fire?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,814

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Just landed via Instagram:

A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

Trending via Facebook:

“You’re a psychopath!” At least I’m on a path, babe, sort your life out.

Just landed via YouTube:

What a time to be alive! (Derogatory)

Trending via Discord:

For once, I’d like to spiral into control.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Live now on Instagram:

My wife has a weird habit of starting conversations by saying, “Are you even listening to me?”

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.

Spotted on Messenger:

Accepting you’re about to throw up, gotta be the worst feeling on God’s green earth.

Going viral on Discord:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

74 shares on Twitch this month:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

63 shares on Twitch this month:

Juggling screen time is the ultimate multitasking Olympics.

21 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do all day.

91 shares on Snapchat this month:

Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.

19 shares on WeChat this month:

There are only two kinds of people, and I avoid them both.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

88 shares on Slack this month:

My boss was like, “People working from home are just pretending to work,” and it’s like, dude, what do you think I’m doing in the office?

35 shares on TikTok this month:

Tired of being the responsible adult. When can I become the irresponsible adult?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when I’m typing away, expecting autocorrect to have my back, and I look down and just see awjdbdmkskan.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Going to a concert with a tomato in each hand just to make the band nervous.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Me and my best friend saying, “Hey, who are we to judge,” after spending 6 hours gossiping.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

They say that 50 is the new 40, but these traffic police are having none of it.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I told my suitcase we wouldn’t be going on vacation this year; now it’s dead inside and I’m left with emotional baggage.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If your wife uses “I” it means she will be doing something. “We” means you will be.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine hating me, and I’m over here with one hand in my pocket, and the other one giving a high five.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,857

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Humans can accomplish so much, unless it’s parking at a shopping center during the holidays.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Tariff this, tariff that. When is somebody gonna tariff my clothes and kiss me?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

We live in a cosmic tornado, but sure, let’s all get jobs.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Oh, to live in an apartment alone and do whatever I want.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

No, you don’t understand. This is my special mistake. I keep making it because it is very dear to me, like an old friend.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

So many people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Going viral on Messenger:

Disliking me is valid. I probably confronted you on your poor behavior, while everyone else just accepted it.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Stop worrying about being weird and start being weirder.

Going viral on Instagram:

The worst part about waking up is all the remembering.

Shared recently on Slack:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Just shared via YouTube:

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.

Trending via Telegram:

Please don’t ask me about my dream job. I would never work in my dreams.

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