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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Crashed my car reading a billboard that said, “Don’t text and drive.”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

Maybe the clouds, trees, and flowers love looking at you too.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Bro to bro: Never get your haircut on the day of a special event.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

One week without chocolate. I can no longer hear anything in my left eye.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Do you ever want sleep but sleep doesn’t want you?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Be nice today, the world is on fire.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2454 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,616

Funny Quotes Topics

15,288

Funny Quotes Images

12,616

3 minutes ago

3,461

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

Whatever you do today, do it with the confidence of a 4-year old wearing a Batman cape.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

Breaking via Messenger:

Be the spooky thing in the woods that you wish to see in the world.

Going viral on Threads:

It doesn’t matter how old you are, when it starts thundering and lightning, you go and sit at the window to watch.

Trending via X:

For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

Just shared via Twitch:

Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I want to text this person, but I need to have shame and self-respect.

Shared recently on Slack:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Jan 28, 2025

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the age-old question of exes – the all too familiar "whys" that linger in our minds like a never-ending game of mental gymnastics 🤔💔 From pondering why it didn't work out to why they thought pineapple belonged on pizza, exes always leave us questioning life's mysteries! 😂 #ExFiles #WhysBeforeGuys

breakup, call, ex, humor, i, joke, relationship, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2454 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,616

Funny Quotes Topics

15,288

Funny Quotes Images

12,616

3 minutes ago

3,450

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Toddlers be like, we can do this the hard way or the harder way.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

I’m not calling anyone daddy unless I’m asking for money for the mall.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Exercise won’t cure your depression, but it can make you hotter than your enemies.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Naked and Afraid because there’s a spider in the shower with me.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

Finally my winter fat has gone. I now have spring rolls.

Making waves on Telegram:

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

Just shared via Reddit:

The sun really clocks out for the day before I do. That’s insane.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Dear unsuccessful applicant, we ultimately decided to split the role between existing staff without paying any of them extra.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Toilets are not a crime scene, traces may be removed!

Just landed via WhatsApp:

For whom the doom scrolls!

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

The crematorium is my last hope for a hot body.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

Spotted on Slack:

Vatican City should be called Popenhagen.

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